Hollywood and me, again

Okay, I’m on record as saying I like movies:  good, bad, and indifferent.  But maybe we need an entirely new evaluative category (I suggest “movies for non-earthlings”).  I have read the Golden Globes blurb in the NYT, and behold, these are the plots that merit awarding:

Brokeback Mountain” — “It’s a Big Country” gone gay all over.

Syriana” — CIA and American oil magnates kill handsome young Arabs to sustain ugly old ones.

Munich” — Israelis murder Palestinians until, nauseated by the shoddiness of their existence, they move to Brooklyn.

Good Night, Good Luck” — American media good, American government bad (but lucky?).

The Constant Gardner” — Axis of evil?  It’s the (American) pharmaceutical companies, of course.

Capote” — “The Maltese Falcon” with Sam Spade gone gay – oh, never mind.

Somebody help me out here.

UPDATE: Help is here.  Of a sort.  Another message from the earthling portion of the movie audience.


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